Band 9 model answer
The question of how best to curb criminal behaviour divides opinion, with some advocating tougher custodial sentences while others favour rehabilitative alternatives. Although deterrence has its place, I believe that addressing the underlying causes of crime is ultimately more effective.
Those who support lengthier prison terms argue primarily from the principle of deterrence. If potential offenders know that a serious crime will result in many years behind bars, they may think twice before breaking the law. Extended incarceration also keeps dangerous individuals away from the public, offering communities a tangible sense of safety. Nations that impose strict penalties for offences such as drug trafficking often cite comparatively low offending rates as evidence that severity works.
Nevertheless, the opposing view is, in my opinion, more compelling. Prisons frequently function as breeding grounds for further criminality, where first-time offenders learn from hardened inmates and emerge more alienated than before. A more constructive approach targets the roots of crime, namely poverty, addiction and a lack of education. Investment in vocational training, mental-health support and community programmes can reintegrate offenders and reduce reoffending far more sustainably than confinement alone. Norway, whose rehabilitative system boasts one of the lowest recidivism rates in the world, illustrates this potential vividly.
In conclusion, while harsher sentences may deter some criminals and temporarily protect citizens, they do little to resolve the conditions that generate crime in the first place. A justice system that prioritises rehabilitation and prevention is therefore likely to yield safer societies over the long term.
Examiner’s notes
- Clearly addresses both views in separate paragraphs before giving a decisive opinion, satisfying Task Response at Band 9.
- Cohesion is natural and varied (Nevertheless, namely, over the long term) rather than mechanical linking.
- Lexical range is precise and topic-specific: deterrence, custodial sentences, recidivism, reintegrate.