Band 9 model answer
Children are bombarded daily with advertisements meticulously engineered to exploit their immaturity, and a growing chorus of voices insists that such marketing should be outlawed entirely. I largely agree with this position, although I believe a complete ban is neither wholly practical nor strictly necessary to protect young audiences.
The central justification for prohibition is that young children simply cannot distinguish persuasion from information. Lacking developed critical faculties, they accept advertising claims uncritically and pester their parents for sugary snacks, expensive toys and branded clothing. This not only strains household budgets but also fuels childhood obesity and a corrosive materialism, in which a child's self-worth becomes dangerously tied to the possessions they own. Shielding a manifestly vulnerable audience from deliberate manipulation is therefore a wholly legitimate aim of public policy, and one I find difficult to oppose.
That said, an outright ban raises serious difficulties that its advocates tend to overlook. Advertising funds much of the children's programming and free online content that families value, so removing it altogether could impoverish the very services children enjoy most. Moreover, defining a 'child-directed' advertisement is notoriously slippery, since a great deal of marketing reaches mixed audiences of adults and minors simultaneously. A more proportionate response would be tight regulation: prohibiting junk-food promotion, restricting broadcast times around school hours and banning the most manipulative techniques, rather than imposing a sweeping blanket prohibition.
In conclusion, while I strongly sympathise with the desire to protect children from exploitative advertising, I favour rigorous, targeted regulation over a total ban. Such a calibrated approach would curb the worst abuses while preserving the funding and freedoms that ultimately benefit children themselves.
Examiner’s notes
- Task Response: the writer takes a nuanced but clear stance ('largely agree... though... not wholly practical'), directly answering the 'to what extent' question and sustaining the qualification throughout.
- Coherence and Cohesion: ideas are grouped logically, with the concessive pivot 'That said' introducing counter-considerations, and referencing ('such marketing', 'this') maintaining smooth flow.
- Lexical Resource: vivid and accurate vocabulary including 'corrosive materialism', 'critical faculties' and 'proportionate response' demonstrates flexible, sophisticated word choice.