Band 9 model answer
It is increasingly claimed that cutting back on meat is among the most powerful environmental choices an individual can make. I largely agree with this assertion, though I would stress that it should complement, rather than replace, broader systemic action.
The environmental case against heavy meat consumption is robust. Livestock farming, particularly cattle rearing, is a leading source of methane, a greenhouse gas far more potent than carbon dioxide. It also demands vast tracts of land, frequently obtained by clearing forests, and devours staggering quantities of water and feed crops. By shifting towards a plant-based diet, an individual can shrink their personal carbon footprint more dramatically than by almost any other single lifestyle change, since the inefficiency of converting grain into meat is so pronounced.
That said, I would temper the claim with a note of realism. Individual dietary choices, however virtuous, cannot by themselves resolve a crisis driven by industrial agriculture, energy systems and government policy. If consumers reduce demand while subsidies continue to prop up intensive livestock production, the overall impact will be muted. Personal change is therefore necessary but insufficient on its own.
In conclusion, I agree that eating less meat is one of the most effective steps an individual can take, given the disproportionate environmental burden of livestock. However, its true potential will only be realised when such personal restraint is reinforced by structural reform. The most meaningful progress arises when conscientious consumers and bold policymakers pull in the same direction.
Examiner’s notes
- Task Response: the essay takes a clear, qualified position ('largely agree') and defends it consistently, acknowledging the limits of individual action without contradicting the stance.
- Coherence and Cohesion: the pivot to qualification is handled smoothly with 'That said, I would temper the claim', and ideas connect logically toward the synthesising conclusion.
- Lexical Resource: precise agricultural and environmental terms such as 'methane', 'plant-based diet', 'carbon footprint' and 'intensive livestock production' display strong lexical control.