Band 9 model answer
Whether the young should wield greater influence over political decisions provokes lively debate. Some contend that their voices are essential, whereas others insist that inexperience disqualifies them. Having weighed both positions, I believe young people deserve a far larger role than they currently enjoy.
Those who would limit youthful involvement point to a lack of life experience. Major decisions about taxation, defence or healthcare, they argue, require an understanding of consequences that only years can provide, and impulsive choices driven by idealism may prove costly. From this perspective, the young are better served by observing and learning before they govern.
The opposing view, which I find more persuasive, stresses that political decisions shape the future these very people will inhabit. Climate policy and national debt, for instance, will burden today's teenagers for decades, so excluding them is both unjust and short-sighted. Moreover, young citizens often bring technological fluency and moral urgency that established politicians lack, qualities that can reinvigorate a complacent system. Experience, after all, can be acquired through participation rather than mere waiting.
In my judgement, the solution is not to hand over power wholesale but to integrate young voices meaningfully, through youth councils, lower candidacy ages and genuine consultation. In conclusion, while caution about inexperience is understandable, the stronger argument is that those who will live longest with political outcomes ought to help determine them. Empowering the young enriches democracy rather than endangering it.
Examiner’s notes
- Task Response: a model 'discuss both views' answer that gives balanced coverage to each side before stating a clear personal opinion ('I believe young people deserve a far larger role') that is sustained to the conclusion.
- Coherence: each paragraph is unified around a single controlling idea, and the writer flags evaluation explicitly ('The opposing view, which I find more persuasive') so the reader always knows the stance.
- Lexical Resource: precise abstract nouns and collocations ('technological fluency', 'moral urgency', 'reinvigorate a complacent system') convey ideas economically at a high band.