Band 9 model answer
The relentless spread of global commerce and media has prompted fears that unique local cultures are being flattened into a single, homogenous whole. While this anxiety is understandable, I contend that globalisation, on balance, revitalises rather than destroys cultural distinctiveness.
Those who warn of cultural erosion point to the ubiquity of identical products, films and fashions across the planet. A teenager in Nairobi may now consume the same streamed entertainment as one in Stockholm, and traditional crafts can struggle to compete with mass-produced imports. Where younger generations associate prestige exclusively with foreign goods, indigenous languages and customs may indeed wither, as has occurred with several minority tongues in recent decades.
Nevertheless, the opposing view is more persuasive. Global connectivity has handed marginalised communities unprecedented tools to broadcast and monetise their heritage. Artisans now sell handmade textiles worldwide through online marketplaces, and folk musicians cultivate international audiences who would otherwise never have encountered them. Moreover, exposure to outsiders frequently sharpens a community's sense of its own identity, prompting deliberate efforts to document dialects, festivals and culinary traditions before they fade. In this sense, globalisation functions less as an eraser than as a mirror.
In conclusion, although the worldwide circulation of culture undeniably threatens the most fragile traditions, its capacity to amplify and preserve local heritage is, in my judgement, the stronger force. Rather than resisting global exchange outright, societies would be wiser to harness its reach to safeguard what makes them singular.
Examiner’s notes
- Task Response: the introduction stakes out a clear personal position ('revitalises rather than destroys'), both views are developed in separate paragraphs, and the conclusion restates the stance without merely repeating it.
- Coherence and Cohesion: paragraph-opening signposts ('Those who warn', 'Nevertheless, the opposing view') manage the discussion structure, while the metaphor 'less as an eraser than as a mirror' binds the body to the theme.
- Lexical Resource: precise collocations such as 'cultural distinctiveness', 'indigenous languages' and 'monetise their heritage' show topic-specific range without strain.